1) A Minah is only a Minah when she denies that she is one.
Mentioned too many times in most of my entries, because Macam Pahamers need reminding. Yes Ms Macam Paham, you are a Minah too. Pls see point 2).

Please stop denying that you are not a Minah. Gigi kalo terselit belachan, takmo nak step makan cheese. Embrace the culture, don't kill your own race. You may want to refer to point 4) if you think that Minahs are scums of the universe and buat malu orang Melayu jer. Yang buat malu is actually kalo kau tak sedar diri yang kau tu siapa.

2) As long as you are a Malay girl, you're automatically a Minah.
Self-explanatory. If you like Mat Sallehs (read: Caucasian. re-read: Caucasian and Eurasian lain barang ok, pls jgn confuse), then itu kau punya seluar dalam. You can like other races for all we care, tapi kalau dah Melayu, by default Minah.

If you are insulted that you are labelled a Minah just because you are a Malay girl, then you should think twice about labelling that girl who sat across you in the train a Minah just because she dresses like what you think 'a Minah' dresses like. Who's labelling who now?

Which brings me to point 3).

3) A Minah is a true Minah if she likes to call other people Minah.
Besides denying that you are a Minah, and hoping that this will somewhat disassociate you with Minah-ism, you still like to call others Minah. Sorry my friend, this just makes you more Minah than ever.

4) Minahs are not necessarily uneducated because they don't speak English, it's a preference.
If reading my blog does not convince you that Minahs aren't always stupid bimbos, then I suggest that you get off your computer and make new friends. Lots of new friends because you need to shed that stereotype thinking that all Minahs are empty in their heads, finish formal education at ITE (which you probably think is the lowest type of tertiary education) and main aim is life is to kahwin and make babies.

Everything we do is a preference, please at least remember that.

5) Minah and Minahrep are entirely different things, do not confuse them.
A Minahrep is a gangsta version of a Minah; tattoos, fights, drugs, rehab, jailbird boyfriend and kid in tow.

Minahreps generally don't give two hoots what you call them, because they have other more serious things (like siapa nak jaga baby kalau dia kerja shift) to think about, but it's not nice to call a Minah, Minahrep. It's like if I saw you holding hands and kissing your Mat, I call you a slut. Not very accurate now is it?

1) Blogging platform – Blogspot

Most minahs prefer Blogspot as their blogging platform because it’s easy to customize compared to most of the other blogging platforms. Minahs are a fickle bunch, you know. It’s all pink and cutesy on Monday and by Friday, it could all be sleek and black like her Bebe top.

2) Graphics

Minahs love their glitter graphics because anything shiny and pretty attracts them. Most of them particularly love butterflies- in either pink or purple - and they like to make their statements through these graphics. “I love my Boyfriend”, “My heart is taken” & “The shit you hear about me might be true, but it could be as fake as the bitch who told you” are all common graphics bersepah on a Minah’s blog.

3) Language ( My favourite )

Minahs have their own cute language and it can sometimes be pretty puzzling and questionable. Although I’m a Minah myself, it took me a LONG time to finally figure out what Jyeah is. Some examples of their language:

1) Ehk = Eh
2) Euu = You
3) Jyeah = Yeah
4) Owite = Alright
5) Nytes = Night
6) Taqare = Take care
7) Beeyatch = Biatch (Bitch)
8) Hiakdush = Some punching sound.
9) Mamam = Makan
10) Darla = Bastardised version of Darling.

Minahs generally blog in English, which is pretty strange, considering that most don’t really speak English in real life.

4) Basic Sidebar Contents: Intro, Wishlist & Picture of Boyfriend

When you enter a Minah’s blog, you’re going into their territory and personal ranting space, so they will personalize their side bar as such.

The simple rule is: Clique members get 3 hearts (and sometimes a picture) while the rest gets 1 heart. And don’t any of you dare touch a Minah’s hubby, kalau nak rasa tamparan wanita, dipersilakan. Wouldn’t want to mess around with us, last warning eh!

As for the Wishlist, it’s just great for us to be able to use the strikethrough function!

5) Embed a song

Using Imeem preferably although sometimes it’s a bitch becos of the 30 seconds limit. Most of the time it’s R&B and Reggaeton tracks. But when Minah & Mat baru break, she will replace party tunes with Malay jiwang retak songs or sad Indonesian songs. But when she finds a new boyfriend, it’s back to the party tunes baybeh!

Their favourites are Kat Deluna, Beyonce, Rihanna & Pitbull.

Some Minahs can be really lokek about information. Sometimes I hear a great party tune, tag her politely about the song title and she gets all snarky about it.  Can’t blame her though, it is her “SPACE TO RANT AND BITCH and if you don’t like it, you can go click the red X on top on the right hand corner.” Some Minahs put in a lil bit of Javascript so “If you’re a hater, pls be clicking here.”, where ‘here’ is the Javascript command that will close that window.

Minahspeak is not limited to verbal communication. We Minahs love to text, and sure we've developed a distinct text language, sometimes you find hard to comprehend. Different Minahs have different styles, but generally, after a couple of messages, we'll adapt to each other's form of texting and we are able to understand.

But for the forever lost, here are 5 basic guidelines for Minah style texting, just to help you understand.

1. Spell everything differently.
Substitute i with y.
eg. like = lyk, nite = nyte
Substitute y with e.
eg. Hapi Bdae. Todae. Who sae I minah?

2. Be creative with shortforms.
Don't bother with 'takper' or even, 'takpe'.
Go with 'xpe'. x = tak.
You know, like when you don't want something you cross it out.

3. Use the number '0', in place of the letter 'o'.
eg. El0. K0l i.
Oh and if your prepaid is low, tell your friend, 'pp8 l0w'. (application of rule 2 and 3)

4. Reply to all messages, a 'K' will suffice.
Even if that's gonna cost you 5 cents.
Ni semua manners beb! Duit mana mana leh cari.

5. Leave out alphabets and punctuations.
'Gi mane?' can be effectively shortened to 'G ane'
If you need to ask who your friend is with, forget 'Kau ngan sape?', just go 'Ko n sape' (remember, no punctuation).
eg. ko n sape nak g ane k ku tgh siap

Don't worry, your friend will understand that euu are trying to ask her who she's with, where euu guys are headed and that euu are getting ready.